Monday 21 November 2011

exam time

Hey guys, studying for an exam so I will just leave you with a few ponderisms... I did get stuck on a few.

Ponderisms:

Can you cry under water?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. But it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.

Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a haemorrhoid when it's in your butt?

Wednesday 9 November 2011

Broken car and ponder-isms


So this week I found myself on the side of a freeway in my broken down car. As inconvenient as it is, it has given me some time to write some of this blog. It has given me the chance to view the life of the freeway I was on. I saw a lot of people driving past in their suits after a hard day others maybe just driving home after visiting family, truckies that have probably driven all day and will until the wee hours of the night. It is such a variety of people, all with their own tale to tell. This train of thought led me to remember a book that I read a few years ago, it was called Bypass, can’t remember the author’s name but he used to be a Jesuit priest so he had plenty of stories to tell. It was an interesting book, it told of how he rode a bike from Sydney to Melbourne not only a long but a life changing and liberating journey, all this intermingled with stories of heroics, tragedy, folklore, history and titbits of peoples’ lives. I implore you to seek it out and read it.
As I sat there I also realised how much I needed the car but took it for granted, it’s fair to say I didn’t exactly look after it. But then I was stuck there on the side of a freeway and out how much I really need it. I use it to get to and from work, university, placement and anywhere I need to go. This may be one reason why I haven’t looked after it, because I couldn’t do without it for a day. As I coughed out the fumes of another unhealthy car going past I wished my little goer would start and I could be out of here, but no such luck for me. And then there went a car towing some race cars, they looked like they could go. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t wish a have a different car, it’s perfectly fine, it gets me from A to B, and well at least it got me from A to B.
Because my car had broken down this meant I had to catch public transport. Luckily I misread the timetables and they met up perfectly (to be honest I was really worried.) But sitting there on the train I was reminded about what I was thinking about when I was stuck on the freeway, I was thinking about all those peoples’ stories. Most were in business attire some looked like they were off to Melbourne for the day, and one I overheard was going to the hospital.
Have you ever attempted to start a conversation with anyone on public transport? I did, and it didn’t go too well. Every time I spoke to someone they would look at me as if I had a disease and got back to staring into the oh so interesting middle distance. This led me to ask, if humans are such social creatures, why then do we surround ourselves with people but then endeavour to not speak with them? I would have thought that would be against our very nature.
This seems pretty long so I might cut it off there.
Witty comment of the week
All men like to think they are marrying nymphomaniacs.
The problem is that after a few years the nympho leaves but the maniac doesn't.

Monday 17 October 2011

start of a new life

Today has been a positive day for me, not only have things been going right, but I got to see my new born baby nephew today. I don't see myself as an emotional rock, but I don't turn into a blabbering mess watching a chick flick either, but today I felt like I was happy for the first time in a long time. Holding a baby less than 24 hours old had me thinking about the future this child would have, would he be a talented athlete? Would he be the most popular person in his class? Will he be humanitarian and give to people what they cannot reach? All these things were running through my mind, as I looked at his tiny face. His entire future ahead of him, and a lot of it could and would be decided by his family. If he is fortunate enough to have a family that is not torn apart by anything and has a support base. This is not to say people in split families have no choice but it is certainly easier for kids with just two parents.
We all have to admit none of us are perfect, and let's be honest none of us will ever be, is this because of our choices? Our family? Our friends? Is everything we do influenced by our first few days, weeks, months, years of our lives? Our family definitely has an influence on our life, every step of it in fact. You make friends with people who your parents generally approve of, and sometimes ones who they do not (depending on what phase you're going through) you date people based on the values your parents have brought you up on. Maybe, just maybe, he could be a good person, and exceed the stereotypes laid upon people.
This is only a short blog because I am in the middle of an organisational crisis, and have other priorities but I promise that they will continue to come out in a sporadic fashion.
My witty comment of the week:

To the optimist, the bag of chips is half full,

To the pessimist, the bag of chips is half empty,

Tuesday 4 October 2011

2011 AUG Gold Coast and plenty of beers

Hi guys! Welcome back to my blog, it has been a while since my first post but that is because I have been competing in the Australian University Games in the Gold Coast. I was competing in ultimate frisbee, if you don't remember I mentioned that I played ultimate frisbee in my first blog, I will explain the game in this blog. I also went to the AFL grand final to watch Geelong win their 3rd premiership in 5 years which is a remarkable feat in itself.

The Australian university games are pretty much an event where a lot of Australian universities come together and compete in different sports, similar to the Olympic games. What is not similar is that almost as soon as the last game is played the competitors get drunk, very drunk, or at least I did with my team. I played for Ballarat university ultimate frisbee, our temporary name is Ballarat university frisbee friends due to an ordering malfunction. (BUUF was changed to BUFF.) It was an excellent week where BUFF came 5th in division 2 and  shared the spirit award with Flinders Fury in div 2 and overall.

The aim of ultimate frisbee is to score 15 points first, or after a time cap of any where between 80 and 120 minutes to have higher points. To score one must catch the disc in the opposition's end zone. An extra rule is you cannot move with the disc, and you have 10 seconds with it, which is counted by an opposition player who is on the mark. When a point is scored teams switch ends and whoever scored throws the disc to the opposition. That's just the jist of the game, I won't go into any other details about it.

I was thinking the other day, just how sports effect most people, I will use Australian rules football as an example. Australian rules has clubs all over Australia but the main 17 play in the Australian football league. These teams often provide stimulus in the local economy when they are winning and if the team you support wins you are generally happier during the week. I have no scientific evidence but, I'm sure that if the team you follow in whatever sport wins you will be a lot happier than if it lost. This comes after my team Geelong cats football club won the grand final of the Australian football league, and to say the least I'M VERY HAPPY! Maybe those of you who read this blog could leave a comment about what team you follow and how your team effects you, although I don't really want people spraying on other sports... :S

Anyway, thanks for reading! I'm happy to get this second one out of the way, and have some ideas on what to write about next. Maybe if you want my views on anything you could leave a comment?

My witty comment of the week
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Tuesday 20 September 2011

first blog

Hey my name is Ted, this is my first Blog, I'm writing this purely because I have an assignment due tomorrow and wish to procrastinate in every possible way. I have always wanted to get my message out into the world, just didn't know what format. I thought of having a youtube VLOG but that would not have worked for me as I tend to ramble and it is very hard to edit video but incredibly easy to edit text. I hope to write a Blog every week with topics ranging from my university course (education) to simple things such as what I've been thinking about.
About me:
As I've stated my name is Ted, I'm an Australian and study education at university. I do spend most of my time socialising and debating about random things with my mates and find that these debates help define who I am. I also spend a lot of time involved with sports, I am a rowing coach with a local school and have had a particularly succesful rowing career whilst at school, I am also involved with the sport of Ultimate frisbee, it is a very fun sport, one of my future blogs will be on this topic. I am engaged online in many forums including josefvstalin.com I know it looks incredibly communist but I am open to all political debates and have not made a choice on the matter, I just enjoy the community that has come about because of the videos that comrade stalin creates. On youtube I enjoy the videos from many gaming people including Seananners, Hutch and Mr Sark, creative videos from Freddiew and tobuscus (mainly his literals) and finally bloggers like Nerimon, Charlieissocoollike and godsteeth. These people are all incredibly talented and I hope that I one day will have a following similar to theirs.
Any way, back to that assignment, it's an assignment based on the teaching of proficient reading to children in the middle years. This would be fine if I didn't have to reference anything, referencing is possibly a student's worst enemy, it takes far too long and you actually need to make sure it is accurate. If I ever write anything with a statement that isn't mine I will reference it for those that wish to quote me or would like to read further into the topic.
My aim:
My aim for this blog is to have people read understand and debate over the topics I write about. I welcome all types of constructive criticism but have no time for trolls. My passions for life will often be the topic for these posts and hope that this blog can become a passion.
Witty comment for the week:
Time is the best teacher, unfortunately it kills all of its students.